What's Worth More Than Gold?

EXACTLY as I remember it.

One summer day, after getting twist ice cream cones at the small town Dairy Queen (I have come to know now that just about every rural town has one, which is AWESOME but costly caloric wise for me), my Mom was driving us back to my Grandparent's house when we spotted a rainbow. It wasn't just any rainbow, it was the boldest, closest rainbow that we had ever seen, and I have yet to witness another even like it.

At first it was a laugh, we were heading in the same direction as where it was, so it stayed in our view. It kept getting bigger, closer. As we turned down the road to the house it seemed just beyond the trees, like you could reach out and touch it. As we made the turn it was a bit further out of reach. Oddly enough not a word was spoken, my Mother just hit the gas and the chase began. We were all on the same wavelength. We were going to see the end of the rainbow.

She blew past the house and babied it around the sharp turn. As we got closer to town it seemed to tease us, making its way at a leisurely pace that quickened as we seemed to gain ground. We made it to the edge of town to find ourselves defeated as it leapt out of reach, seeming a hundred miles away. When my Mom stopped to turn the car around she asked: "What do you think would have happened if we caught it?"

My brothers exclaimed that there would definitely be a pot of gold. My mind was elsewhere, in a dream that resembled Oz just a little bit. All of 15 years old I could not wait to get away from the town where we lived back in Oklahoma.

I spent the formative years of my life living in my Grandparent's house, which was nestled in a 200 acre plot of land (that my Pappaw actually rented to companies that grew soybeans and corn) just outside of a little unincorporated town of about 27 people (not sure if I counted so it may have been less or more) named Claiborne in Ohio. When I was about 12 we moved to an 11 acre plot of land (where I eventually learned the joy of feeding bottle calves at 4:30am) outside a town in Oklahoma which had a population of about 200 people at the time. I didn't even get to go to school there before there was a consolidation, and the rural school was assumed by the little bit bigger school in a town that had a population of around 1000. Moving was hard on us in more ways than one.

Being far from family is hard. Being in that small town was even harder. Nothing could have prepared us for the perpetual unwelcoming atmosphere.

I think that my parents thought that it would get better. As time went on it did in some ways. People that came to know us were friendlier over time, but we were made to know at every opportunity that we were outsiders, pariahs, never to truly be excepted into the community. The negativity was so overbearing that with every passing day I became more and more determined that I was going to leave that negative burg as soon as I got the chance. I didn't know exactly where I was dreaming of moving, but it would be better anywhere but there. This I thoroughly believed. Boy was I wrong.

After finishing college I fell in love with a man who would soon become my Husband. He moved to a city in the South and so I followed. It was a beautiful place, with tall majestic pines, emerald green grass, perfect year round temps. This sounds silly, but I remember feeling like Dorothy Gale opening the door to our apartment to the dazzling technicolor world outside. And so it was...for the first few days after moving in. As ideal as the surroundings were, I was shocked and saddened to discover that the very same negative attitude to newcomers was present in that pretty little town, but magnified because I was American while my Husband was not. We'll just leave it at that.

I tried to imagine that I was going through what my family did when they initially moved, even though there were different factors that applied to my Husband and I. I tried to stay positive, taking the time that I had while looking for a job to volunteer so that I could meet people. It worked for a while but people rotated out so often that I had no consistent base for building a social network. Over time though, like back home, we did build some sturdy relationships with some very lovely people just in time to move.

I can't describe to you the relief of leaving that town. Unbelievably it eclipsed the fear of the unknown to become our reality in Kansas. Although some might see it as adventurous, we were moving to a town that we had no real knowledge of outside of what we had noted in our internet searches. It was no adventure to us. It was an escape. With every mile that we passed as we crossed the state line of Kansas our anxiety began to grow. We were absolutely sure that a new negative normal awaited us.

Little did we know that what awaited us was worth more than gold. What's worth more than gold? I can tell you from my perspective what is: a welcoming atmosphere. What awaited us was a town that embraced us so thoroughly that from the very first moment we felt we were home. No matter where I roam I can't wait to get back! And I have yet to go to a community where I don't feel welcome. Yes, there are negative spaces and sometimes attitudes, that's a given with any place. The only difference lays in the heart of Kansans. 

Now we all remember at the end of the story the Good Witch of the North asks Dorothy what she learned. My answers are different because Kansas hasn't always been home to me, but I think they are worth sharing:

• Feeling welcome makes life grand. Poor experiences have taught me that a welcome atmosphere is what I will always seek in the future (if I we ever choose to move that is)
• The people make the place. You could live in the most beautiful place on earth, but if the people there go out of their way to remind you that you don't belong, well...enough said.

Now I am sure you are saying to yourself "That's a nice little chirpy story about a pretty amazing experience, but that experience ain't mine!"

If that is the case, all that I can say is that I understand. I know that the fairy tale that I experienced in Kansas is not everyone's. I will admit there are places here that just aren't that welcoming. It's true, it's sad, and it doesn't need to be that way.

What if...you wanted to make your community a more welcoming place?

There are many great ways to do just that!

You could search the Kansas PRIDE Database for welcoming new community members. Some do welcome baskets with a bevy of local coupons and adverts for local businesses - and idea which I LOVE!

A colleague of mine, Nancy, had a First Friday Call that featured Ben Winchester, and "Rewriting the Rural Narrative" where he gives some tips on welcoming newcomers that includes:

• Giving them space to settle, and not approaching them immediately to be on a board
• Taking newcomers out to dinner to welcome them and help them get to know the community, and support a local business in the process!

In time you may find that newcomers might gravitate toward volunteering. Making sure that they are informed of what the role entails, and being open to their ideas is important for keeping them motivated to return. The Kansas PRIDE Webinar on Volunteer Recruitment and Retention has been a great tool for communities looking for ideas on how to catch the eye of potential interested parties.

I know that when I came to Kansas a warm welcome was worth more than gold to me. While at the moment that may not be the case in some communities, there is always an opportunity to change.

Life is Changing - Shopping Local

In just days life as we knew it changed. Dining in restaurants, shopping for groceries, planning our spring break trip while the kids were eating breakfast before school. Now many of us are working from home, others are keeping the community safe and supplied with needed goods and services. Thanks to everyone who is on the front lines while we wait for this to pass!

No one knows what the new normal will be once the COVID-19 threat is behind us. Big box and mega online retailers will likely survive and continue chugging along, but will your locally owned stores, restaurants, and service providers? Seeing social media posts from businesses in my area, some were starting to experience a slowdown even before the social distancing recommendations went out. Then one day they adapted and opened with additional sanitation and safety precautions, the next day - closed to all but curb-side service because of new official health recommendations.

I won’t go into statistics. We all know small business is important to a community and creates jobs, and every large business today started as a small business at some point. Watch your favorite businesses’ social media pages and websites for how they are still trying to serve their customer base and to stay open during this difficult time.

If you own a small business and are wondering how you can change the way you’re doing things, or if you want to help your local businesses out, here are some ideas I’ve seen in the past few days that might be of interest:

• A local bakery/restaurant: Changed their normal lunch options for dine-in into frozen meals customers could pick up curb-side in the evenings on their way home from work. Cinnamon rolls and breads are available for morning pickups. Cookies and cupcakes are available at both pickup times. Using an online ordering service (even a Google Docs Form would work), the owner knows the night before what to have ready for the next day so there’s no guessing.
• A bookstore: Curb-side pickup of any book in stock, or free local delivery. $1 shipping if you’re out of the area or just not interested in having someone come to visit you. Coffee and cookies also available curbside, and an online ordering system available 24/7. The bookstore owners are also planning on live streaming discussions about books they’re reading, and games and activities to do with families stuck at home.
• A yarn store: Started streaming about products they had available and upcoming virtual classes people could take part in. Orders by phone, inexpensive shipping and curb-side delivery. They’ll text you pictures of their yarn and other products and provide recommendations for projects you’re working on. Gift certificates are available, and they are encouraging people to buy extra certificates to leave at the store in order to pay it forward to others as an anonymous gift.
• A flower shop: For a flower shop that is the only one within a 20 mile radius, prom is a big part of their business for the year. With proms now canceled, this is a major concern. This particular store started a marketing campaign to shop local – not just at that shop, but others. They also started highlighting an arrangement of the day at a special price, and encouraging people to buy by offering free delivery to the first person to order that arrangement that day.

How are you adapting for your customers or supporting your local stores? Post a comment and let me know!

Resources: 

If you're a local business, visit ksready.gov's Businesses page for information on how to obtain Small Business Administration Disaster Assistance for economic losses suffered since January 31, 2020. They also have a page for Citizens on how to prepare you and your family for COVID-19 and dealing with related stress and anxiety.

For COVID-19 updates as they related to K-State Research and Extension and Kansas State University, you can visit their new COVID-19 page. 

K-State Research and Extension's Community Vitality Team offers a First Friday e-Call targeted at entrepreneurs and the communities that support them. You can view previous webinars on our Entrepreneurship page and find out about upcoming calls in our sidebar Events calendar. --Jan Steen, jmsteen@ksu.edu

Local Promotion

I last posted about promoting your community for the benefit of visitors. What about promotion to the people who already live and work in your town? It’s true we sometimes think because we know about something, that everyone else does, too. That’s not always the case – and if they do, it’s nice to have a reminder from time to time.

What does it mean to promote locally? If you’re a volunteer community improvement group like a local Kansas PRIDE program, you want people to know what you’re up to. There are three points on a project’s timeline when you’ll want to get the word out:

1. Before a project begins. This lets the community know what’s about to happen and why, how it will benefit them, and how they can participate. Is it a fall festival, a new fitness center, or painting houses in a specific neighborhood? When can they mark their calendars to see the parade or sign up for a gym membership – important to know about the end result, yes – but also, how can they volunteer or donate to the project? Letting people know about your efforts in advance gives them an opportunity to plan on being patrons of those projects, or donating time, skills, or money to help you get it done.

2   2. While that project or event is happening. Everyone had a chance to mark their calendars when you published that pre-project newspaper article or gave a radio interview, but now is when that reminder comes in handy. People may find it a helpful reminder to have an e-mail or social media blast, radio station commercial, or community calendar entry to say when and where the action is taking place.

3   3. Once the project is completed. Talk about the success and how the community benefited or will continue to benefit. If you replaced the playground equipment in the park, now’s the time to announce to the world that it’s ready for their kids to partake in the fun. Promoting your success can also draw in new volunteers or donors who want to be a part of your future successes.

What method of promotion works best? It’s different for every community, large or small. Some have television stations, and in others, radio or social media might work best. Think about how you and your neighbors get their news and tap into that method if you can.

Resources: The Kansas PRIDE program has several videos available on its Education page, one of which is about Telling Your Story.  Visit that page for the video and materials that go along with it.  This is another great opportunity to use the Community Promotion Grant, made possible by the partnership and generosity of the Kansas Masons.  --Jan Steen, jmsteen@ksu.edu

Once Upon a Time, in a State Maybe Far Away...

A yard similar to what I remember.

When the Status Quo is Challenged, I Think of Mr. Rhodes.

I was working on a high school project when I first experienced what my friend's mother referred to as "the party line."

I had picked up the phone and called a friend that could not be there to find out what they had gotten out of the research they had done on The Native American Tribes of Oklahoma (our project). As I spoke with her over the phone I could hear other people talking. Two older women. I hung up and tried again but I got the same result. We could hear one another but we could still hear the older ladies. I asked my friend's mom about it and she said:

"Oh, that's just the old party line. Just go about your business, but be aware that if you can hear them they can hear you."

So we tried our best to continue on over the harping of the older ladies who were wrapped up in bashing another resident of the community. The more I heard the more sad and angry I got.

"Who does he think he is just showing off for the whole town? Plantin' all those flowers!"

"And watering his lawn EVERY SINGLE DAY! Trying to make all us others look bad."

And I knew exactly who they were talking about: Mr. Rhodes.

Mr. Rhodes had lived around and done dealings in town all of his life, although for most of those years he had lived on a farm outside of town. His son had taken over the farm a few years back, and Mr. and Mrs. Rhodes had moved into town to downsize. Not long after they moved Mrs. Rhodes had fallen ill and passed away. That was when Mr. Rhodes had directed his attention fully to his property, which was a nice little house with a decently generous lawn at the south entrance of town, right on the corner of the first cross streets. 

I didn't know the two ladies on the party line, but through all of the time I had to be on the phone I came to know that they were also lifetime residents of the town, they didn't like change (they also had it out for the Library because it was going to be extending/adding on) and one of them was sure she was going to have to take her cat to the vet if it couldn't get the hairball it was working on up and out.

I was happy when we got to hang up. Elated. I was worn out by the negative talk over the party line. On the ride home I began to think.

Town folk where I lived were a thoroughly negative bunch. They hated plenty of things, above all it was taxes, just lower than that was change, and a bit further down the line anything they perceived as trying to make them look bad. I talked to my mom about the party line talk and she sighed, telling me that Mr. Rhodes was always getting hassled about his lawn. Some people had even gone to the city to complain.

Years later Mr. Rhodes again became a major hot topic when a drought began to take hold around the area. Mr. Rhodes had persisted. His lawn and garden remained pristine. Of course this only made things worse, steady complaints actually turned into a neighborhood meeting (meaning the whole town was invited save Mr. Rhodes) to complain and think of ways to "do something about it".

That year someone turned him in to the city for growing okra on his lawn. He told them it was because he enjoyed the flowers. The city responded by upholding an ordinance that relegated fruiting plants to back yard growing. It was a short lived win. Mr. Rhodes stopped growing okra in his front yard, but everything else was a green and gem colored land of splendor within his property borders. 

While Mr. Rhodes actions were rude and crass in the eyes of most town folk, little did he know that his lawn had the admiration of many young folk, including myself, who saw it as a beacon of hope and resilience in a place where the depressing attitude of the town folk was the norm they lived every day. Oddly enough, the day I got accepted into college I remember closing my eyes and thinking of Mr. Rhodes lawn, the beautiful flowers, like an emerald oasis in a harsh dessert (probably because the university grounds reminded me of it as it seemed the only other place alive in the state). The dessert didn't only represent the dead grass of the adjacent lawns, but the bitter negative attitudes of his neighbors.

When some of my high school friends and acquaintances got to house buying age Mr. Rhodes found himself a mentor to the young families trying to beautify their homes. Soon green lawns began to take over in different parts of town. Flowers, whether in the ground or in pots, began to appear. The little town I knew coming up in school was changing, little by little. Nowadays I barely recognize it.

As I age I have come to understand something. Change is hard. Change is sometimes scary. Change can give people an opportunity to either join or resist. You sometimes forget that you were young, starry eyed, and revving to change the world. 

I have also come to realize that when people are negative in a way that is cutting to others, it usually comes from a place of lacking. The feeling that someone else is happy and thriving when you feel that somehow you cannot (whether that be lack of resources or you feel helpless to try to change).

When I look back I think about the older ladies on the party line, cutting Mr. Rhodes down on the phone. Instead of anger I feel some sadness. I wonder if they were widowed and seeing someone taking on such a project made them feel lonely, or wishful that someone might help them.

Maybe others were jealous of the work because it seemed frivolous for him to spend money on water for his lawn and plants when they were barely scraping by. Or that he had so much time on his hands when the rat race was swirling around their heads.

I also wonder "what if".

This comes from a time that I over heard Mr. Rhodes talking to his son at the Co-op. He lived only blocks away and would pop in every now and then when he saw his son's truck parked out front. I sometimes made my way there after school as my mom worked there as a bookkeeper. It was one of those times when I overheard him talking to his son and some of the employees. They asked him why he kept it up, even during the drought. His reply:

"Keeps me active. Gives people something to be upset about. That's just about what some people live for. Your mom's dream was to come live in town in a little house, have a garden that wasn't just for eatin'. She always wanted gladiolas. Never would take out at the farm though, you remember. Learned from some research guy at the university that diggin' them up and storing them over winter improves their chances of comin' back perennial."

Simple interactions, whether a phone call or stopping in to an expert, had helped Mr. Rhodes accomplish his successes in landscaping.

What if:

• People got on board rather than focus so hard on Mr. Rhodes? Your world is what you make it, whether it be a lush garden or a dried out lawn. What if people decided to clean up their lawns? A program like First Impressions might have helped break the ice on the city's situation.

• People decided to do something small? Put out potted plants rather than do the whole lawn. I will tell you one thing, there is nothing more striking in contrast than a pot of flowers against a backdrop of beige grass. Maybe if they knew they could contact Extension to see what types of flowers or plants grew best with little or no water. Maybe that expert that Mr. Rhodes had contacted was a part of the Master Gardeners...or a horticulturist. Spreading knowledge can help people feel empowered, and know who to turn to when issues arise.

• There was a reward system? What if there was a city or community committee charged with creating and maintaining a Yard of the Week/Month? Or an opportunity to send an incentive card, or even a note, to people who they noted were making an effort?

But all of this is in hindsight. I am now a Community Vitality Specialist. I can see these things now, I had no idea then. But deep down somehow I knew I wanted for my small town what I came to understand as a specialist - opportunities...and hope.

And for those that are interested in starting community conversations around the First Impressions of visitors to your community, are looking for resources and knowledge on plant types that grow best here in Kansas, or starting up an effort like Yard of the Month, we have some resources for you!

First Impressions (application included, and many examples of what you can look forward to presentation wise).

Prairie Star Collection (A Collection of Flowers tested by K-State for a Prairie Climate).

Kansas PRIDE Database (to look through to see who else is doing it, and possibly contact them to see how they run it. Be sure to select the Current Year and Yard of the Month on the drop down boxes).

For all of those volunteers out there - THANK YOU for all that you do! - Jaime, jmenon@ksu.edu

The Road Trip

Something I’m very passionate about is travel. Around the country or across the globe – there’s always an opportunity to see something new, meet someone interesting, and make some memories.  Perhaps my favorite excursions are around the state of Kansas.  Not only is it convenient and full of nearby destinations, but it’s also fascinating. I’m not alone in this thought, either.  Groups like the Kansas Explorers Club are made up of people who go on road trips all over Kansas to see what there is to see, do what there is to do, and eat what there is to eat.

I’m sure there are still people who pull out the paper road map to plot their journey.  My parents did that when I was a kid, and we’d somehow end up at a Stuckey’s every time.  A lot has changed since the 70s and 80s, and more often than not I find myself checking my phone or laptop for places to go with the family.  So, what am I likely to find about your community in an online search?

One community I visited in the last few years had a lot of information on their website.  Various stores and several restaurants, it looked like the city knew how to engage with the public and promote the great things going on there.  After the long drive to get there, things weren’t quite what they had seemed online.  Most of the stores were closed, in fact, there was just one open downtown.  Restaurants?  Same story.  The website, I came to find out, hadn’t been updated in years, and while all true when it was written, things changed.  The city employee in charge of updating the site either left, or lost their password, so the town was stuck in 2013 on the web, vastly different than reality.   

While frustrating, the trip was not for nothing.  There were other cool things to see and do there and nearby, plus it served as a great learning opportunity.  This brings me back to the question I asked earlier.  What am I likely to find about your community in an online search?  If someone is considering a journey to your community to check it out as a potential place to visit as a tourist, or maybe as a potential resident if they’re in the market, one tool they’ll likely use first is the internet.  Their goal?  To find out about restaurants, lodging, public events, shopping, historic and recreational options – and to find regularly updated, accurate information to help them make their decision before hitting the “Go” button on their GPS app.

Things to include in your online presence:

• Restaurants – where can I eat and what are some of the local favorites?
• Recreation – parks, disc golf, real golf, hiking trails, fishing.
• Stores – unique buys to everyday needs, including fuel to get back on the road.
• Lodging – maybe it’s just a little too far to get there and back in one day, or maybe there’s so much to do, visitors will need an overnight stay to get it all in.
• Other things to do – museums, historical markers, etc.
• Events – even if that harvest festival or July 4^th celebration is months away, having dates and general descriptions of activities will help people plan their visit to your town.
• Social media – don’t forget links back to your community and event social media pages.  Websites are a good way to get information out to people, but Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets can be used for more on-the-fly updates (Parade route has changed, barbecue has been moved from the park to the community building because of rain, Pizza Cabin is offering 20% off lunch today if you’re from out of town…).

Want some examples of sites that are doing it right? Haysville’s HelloHaysville.com and Council Grove’s CouncilGrove.com are both easy to navigate, have mobile-friendly layouts, and a lot of information about things around town.  You don’t have to pattern your community’s site after another’s, however.  If you were going to go on a road trip, ask yourself what you’d want to know about your destination, then fill in the blanks on your own site.

Resources: If you’re a Kansas PRIDE program Community of Action, there’s a $1,000 Promotion Grant that would be perfect for building a website, redesigning a current one, or creating a social media marketing campaign to tell people all about your town. 

Not in the Kansas PRIDE program yet?  Communities of all sizes from unincorporated to Wichita can participate – for free.  You can learn more about the Kansas PRIDE program’s Benefits, and Enrollment Levels online. --Jan Steen, jmsteen@ksu.edu

Kansas Kind - A Blog for Kansas Community Vitality

Welcome!

Welcome to our maiden voyage utilizing a blog to help spread information to communities in need of resources, specifically in Kansas.

We want this to be a positive space. A place to appreciate the great things, and address some not so great experiences and explore how to make them positive stories. Like sunflowers we're going to follow the sun!

Disclaimer: We plan to highlight a lot of what is working here in Kansas, because there are a TON of wonderfully awesome things about our state. 

Whenever we speak of anything negative it will be of an experience that either turned into, or can turn into, something positive. Feel free to comment to join the conversation, or add your own positive experiences :) 

I (Jaime) will be using the hometown I grew up in a lot as an example, because I sincerely believe that it could have benefited from a PRIDE (or similar) program to help address the many challenges and needs that it had.

So some ground rules:

• Please no negativity. If you can relate that is great! Please do not mention names or places.
• No name calling or cursing. Such posts will be deleted.
• Respect one another, even if someone thinks differently that you do about a subject.
• Be gracious. Everyone has had different experiences in life, do your best to honor others.
• Have fun and ask questions! We can all learn from one another!